Intro #

I always wanted to do that, having a blog again and just talking about how releases happened. It allows me to revisit thoughts that were held at that times, the why and the hows, you know, not really explaining "techniques" (we don't do that here) but more about the situation, the location, the memories.

And also, here's to the music!

The starting point #

Souffle fragile was started in April 2024, no effin' shit, it was in an almost "mixable/pre mastering" state, a song I wanted to motivate evilpaul about making a demo about.

In pure me-fashion, I wanted it to be for a slow-burn one-effect demo at first, let's do Halcyon - Chimera but different. I've started making new logos, gfx, some 3d scenes, running ideas by evilpaul. Started writing the song – people are SO going to hate it – and kept writing ideas.

Unfortunately, the family was at that point in life where we had to pack up our shits for a potential house move and adulting had happened, my synths, gears, mess of cables and more fun stuff, were all put in boxes in waiting for a potential house that did not come until much much later.

The moment #

Finally, we had new keys (adulting) and I was able to unpa… well, not so fast, had to do more adulting, fix more problems, take more time and well, the office space had to be waiting.

Long story short, almost a year had gone in front of my eyes and nothing was done with this track, it's haunting you know, knowing you're sitting on something that needs to be released but you're busy painting walls and doing DIY stuff… actually who am I kidding, things like DIY are much more important.

One morning I've had enough, I knew I was sitting on a good track and I wanted it out of my system straight to the wild forest of Internet where tracks go to die. I had this one night alone at home (minus my daughter teenagering hard in her bedroom) and I plugged everything back together in one huge disorganised mess of cables that we – music people – learned to love and here I was in this mindset again… except that… I had no memory of writing this song…

The struggle #

I remember – I think – starting to work on it, sent it to my friend G-dawg and he gave me some good pointers on what was too much, not needed, the usual "there is a thing but it is not presented well".

So instread of rushing and mixing down, I went back on the composing and arranging table, and it started to sound better and better (sorry if this sound over-confident, I'll do better next time)

But there I finally was, after few days of effin-around, the rough diamond with some good ideas but absolutely bad execution got refined into this slow burn of very personal emotions.

Shameless plug here, it ain't a bad track, #honest.

The companion #

So, I have this track, what am I doing with it eh? Just release it like I'm a young Content™ person? like an animal, sir?

Nah, now I need at least one more song, two-trackers is better than just releasing content over the web. Surely, people will appreciate the effort into packaging an online release with some ceremony.

So yes, I had to make a second track. Not necesarily of the same calibre, one track that just exists, not as content still, but something a bit lighter, perhaps?

So that's how I ended up opening renoise a second time that year, starting to throw things at the wall and voila, a good filler with few feels, come on, the feels, they must be had.

Are we ready yet? #

I needed a cover, again… not an animal here.

I had no real envy to do something in particular, I was not going to bug good graphic artists of the nkurence persuasion ever again for something so low visibility, poor dude and dudettes had served in old Inpuj wars and honestly, they served pretty well and what did they get out of it? AI! fuck it, fuck AI.

The reference, mate, do you see it? #

Duuuuuuh? right? RIGHT?

I often revisit the good old "use a picture" lazy tech, there is this couples of old polaroid pictures I've been using now and there all the time I had to post some stuff on one of my hidden soundcloud accounts, these polaroid are 2011 when I actually got my hands on old sepia and blueish out-of-date polaroid films. A lot of these polaroids are actually from the time our daughter was born, in our first flat in Paris. One of them is me sitting on the sofa in the living, on my laptop, and it's a perfect picture because it's probably how people saw me a lot during that time.

The resulting coverart is definitely a reference to one of the most important album in my life, there's a lot of them though but I felt like it would be kinda funny to actually go and just reuse an old polaroid photo of me and one thing led to an other, the reference almost presented itself like a "Ha ha" moment.

Too much "on the nose"?

Honestly nowadays, you can do anything and nobody notice, I was expecting for somweone to "akshully" me, nobody… nothing, talk about missed opportunites.

Big strong nah, nobody cared and those who could have cared probably do no know me and/or my music.

You alright mate? #

Obviously, some of my dearest french friends had to ask me the big question (u awrite mate?).

After all, "souffle fragile" and "salle d'attente" both sounds like I was heading to the ER and I swear I was not trying to actually get love from people while pretending something awful happened to me. Nothing happened me except the long burn of life.

As often when one pick up songs title is to express something mildly related in a creative way… and no, ain't alright mate like… at all?

Souffle fragile is certainly about mid-lyfe crisis, the feeling of becoming too old for that shit, tired of the hype that goes around every little topics of interest that we all used to share, tired, SO TIRED, of the noise – online –  and tired of the rat race, the fights, the struggles. Just fucking tired mate you know?

Souffle fragile could have meant I have a murmur, or something worst, but no, I'm just tired, my will to go through is weaken, my "breath" – if you will – is getting "short".

ps: No, it was not about a weak soufflé Jessy <3.